Note to self. Let the pros deal with unwanted facial hair. I learned my lesson the first time in 2008 when I tried Nair on my upper lip. Not a pretty sight. Clown lips and a big frown ensued after I left the Nair on too long.
Today wasn’t any better. I tried the inexplicably-named Nads to remove my unwanted facial hair. It seemed too easy: rub the wax strips together, place on face, and rip off the hair from my upper lip.
I ripped and it felt like it hurt, which I took as a good sign. I continued on my beauty routine. Ten minutes later, I looked in the mirror and my upper lip was red. Not on both sides. Just one.
Lovely. Absolutely gorgeous. In my new and improved single status, I am sure to woo any guys that I might go out with. Instead of noticing my charming personality and quick wit, they will be distracted by the red between my nose and my lip. They will stare at it, wondering what sort of self-flagellation I did to get it there.
It will ruin my entire life. The moustache would have been preferable. The only saving grace about the whole moustache-red lip incident is that I am not friends with the pseudo friend that I was before who would have reminded me at every opportunity of my resemblance to a clown.
Of course, the red will fade away. Just like the bad hair cut I had before grew out. Just like the red lip I had before faded away. And just like my eyelashes grew out when I had a psycho woman do my brows. And if anyone is really so distracted by my red lip, I guess there’s nothing I can do about it anyway.
Some women have more serious problems. I do, too, but I don’t choose to share them for the world’s (or my limited readership’s) entertainment. Nor do I intend to share the truthful tragedies of my family and friends so small-minded people can feel better about themselves.
As I’ve survived everything else, I will survive this, too. Unfortunately for those around me, I’m not going to choose to be an Agoraphobic because of the unfortunate incident with the waxing strip. I’m proud that I tried to save myself a little money and have enough cover-up to hide my obvious mistake.
How about you? Have you suffered any beauty injuries?