Feeling hot hot hot!

So here we are....the day every girl dreams of is swiftly approaching! I got engaged over the past month and we are planning a destination wedding. Here is what I thought would be some perks of my destination wedding.

  • Package means I don't have to plan (FALSE)
  • Package means less money (FALSE)
  • Destination means I get a vacation too right? (Also FALSE )

We will be headed to Las Vegas for an August wedding at the Bellagio Fountains. Yes, it is going to be so beautiful and I am so excited I can't stand myself! There are 2 factors that I am having trouble with though. It is going to be at least 100 degrees of heat, I am not sure how my makeup will hold up with this heat, and I am scared to death that my photos may turn out horrible. The weather I can't control, I use a few primer products in my beauty routine now, and where they lack I hope Photoshop and skilled photographers will make up the difference. The other fear I have is crying hysterically and I just cannot seem to come up with a full water proof liner. Any suggestions? I will post pics soon. To tell you the truth I know the one savior I will have is Urban Decay's Primer Potion to hold one of these colorful shadows on to my eyelids!

 

I am posting a video of the wedding at the fountains so you see what kind of forces of nature I may be facing....

The Brazilian Blowout: My Personal Experience

My Hair Looks Better Than It Did Before..........

I did extensive research into Brazilian Blowouts and decided to get one; my pseudo friend was half-responsible for my decision. She wanted to get a Brazilian Blowout, but wanted to see both how my hair turned out first and if the formaldehyde exposure associated with the Brazilian Blowout would instantly kill me before she got anything done.

 

 Because I am constantly battling my own frizzy hair and am weak to the powers that be, I let her convince me to get it done.

 

I researched salons performing the Brazilian Blowouts and found one that offered the Brazilian Blowout at a reasonable price. I was nervous for the appointment and purposely didn’t put any product or style my hair at all so she could see how unmanageable my hair truly was.

 

Like any good stylist, she didn’t comment on my frizz. Instead she explained the Brazilian Blowout procedure. First, she would shampoo the hair with a deep shampoo to remove any excess hair product in my hair. Next, she would apply the solution and then blowdry the hair. Finally, she would carefully flat iron my hair.

 

She warned me that I might experience some itchiness at the scalp, as well as some burning in my nose. When she first applied the solution, I didn’t feel anything, but when she was applying heat—either through the hair dryer or through the flat iron—I didn’t like breathing in the Brazilian Blowout.

 

During the Brazilian Blowout, I got a text message from my so-called friend asking me how it was going. I didn’t answer her: afterall, my nose was burning slightly. I thought back to how the same friend and I were going to get tattoos together and remembered that I was the only one who had a tattoo and wondered how and why I always let her talk me into this sort of sh*t.

 

I left the salon and couldn’t figure out if I liked it; my shoulder-length hair was completely flat. Definitely more Jennifer Aniston looking (if her hair was shorter) than any other star. I resisted the temptation to wash my hair. Instead, I googled Brazilian Blowouts for about thirty minutes. In theory, I knew that I could immediately wash the Brazilian Blowout solution out of my hair, but I was terrified that it wouldn’t last. (If you had to deal with my hair every day, you would understand my feelings.)

 

I waited for six or seven hours, and washed out my hair. My hair felt much finer than usual, but still had a little bit of wave left in it. I let it air dry and it was almost completely straight. The worst part of the whole experience was seeing someone I knew who had perfect hair and had never gotten a Brazilian Blowout in her lifetime.

 

The Brazilian Blowout

The Brazilian Blowout: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Going for the Brazilian Blowout

 

Like 99.9% of the Oprah Winfrey-watching population, I heard about the negative publicity surrounding the Brazilian Blowout. Strangely enough, people seem to object to the fact that the Brazilian Blowout contains formaldehyde, which is normally used to embalm the dead.

 

Do you really want that in your hair? How dangerous is the Brazilian Blowout and are you putting your health at risk in the quest for perfect hair? Now, you don’t have to; you can get the perfect Brazilian Blowout without any formaldehyde. The hairstylist I spoke to who performed the Brazilian Blowout Zero (the plant-based Brazilian Blowout) said that the results were close to the same, but that the Keratin-based Brazilian blowout didn’t last quite as long. Both cost the same.

 

I asked the same hairstylist about how she felt about actual Brazilian Blowouts. She replied that Brazilian Blowouts can cause some stinging at the scalp, but that most of the risk of the formaldehyde being released is to the hairstylists themselves because they are around the chemicals continually. From her point of view, the media is overblowing the danger of the Brazilian Blowout as the majority of salon products contain harmful chemicals. What did she have to say about the results of the Brazilian Blowout? She then said that she had never had a product with better results than the Brazilian Blowout; everyone she gave it to was satisfied with their results.

 

Nail polish also commonly contains formaldehyde and more nail salons are attempting to find alternatives to nail polish with formaldehyde. Despite all of the recent adverse publicity about the Brazilian Blowout, the popularity of the Brazilian Blowout continues to be unrivalled, even among others who have tried different hair straightening treatments.

 

While some may claim that hair straightening is an expensive luxury, to anyone who has had to deal with frizzy, unmanageable hair for most of their lives, it’s definitely an option to consider seriously.

 

Many websites offer reviews on the both the dangers and the benefits of a Brazilian Blowout. Some of the most interesting things I saw were videos of actual Brazilian Blowout-getters who either took before and after videos or put videos up after they washed their hair. Everyone who posted on You-Tube seemed 100% satisfied with their decision to get a Brazlian Blowout.

 

As a result of all of the positive attention on the Brazilian Blowout, I decided to get one, too. Read all about my own experiences with a Brazilian Blowout in Brazilian Blowouts: My Personal Experience.

 

Is Sugaring a Good Alternative to Waxing?

The Sugaring versus Waxing Debate Rages On.......

The raging debate continues: and no, I’m not referring to Arnold and his mistress’ love child (LINK HERE for a strange and twisted morph of what such an adult child might look like). No, the debate I’m referring to focuses on whether sugar or waxing is better to remove unwanted and unsightly hair without shaving or the use of hair removal products.

 

Since sugaring is less common than waxing, I’ll first describe the pros and cons of sugaring. The sugaring concoction is made up of sugar, lemon, and water; it usually looks like a sticky ball and can be used to grab unwanted hairs repeatedly. (Click HERE for a picture of what a sugaring hair removal looks like when performed on a leg.)

 

Sugaring has a few advantages over waxing: most believe that it is less painful than waxing (which is about as fun as having your wisdom tooth removed without novacaine). Sugaring is not as painful because the sugar, lemon, and water adhere to hair and not to the skin, which means that if you are getting a bikini wax, you don’t feel like you are getting your entire labia ripped off in one full swoop. In addition, sugaring is supposedly better for the skin because it is all-natural so it doesn’t tend to irritate the skin as much.

 

Unfortunately for those in the sugaring camp, sugaring is not without its disadvantages; sugaring can’t remove the shortest hairs, so there may be one or two unsightly stray hairs. As it was described to me, this changes after a few sugaring procedures and there are less stray hairs because of the regrowth.

 

 

In the city I live in, the relative cost of sugaring versus waxing is approximately the same, so there isn’t any economic advantage to either sugaring or waxing. This is also true if you choose to do either waxing or sugaring with an at-home kit as both sugaring and waxing at-home kits cost around the same.

 

Another difference between sugaring and waxing is that sugar concoction is removed by pulling in the same direction that the hair grows; the hair is pulled in the opposite direction of the growth when waxing.

 

Earlier, I wrote about electrolysis as a hair removal option, but the cost makes it prohibitive for most women; in addition, the results permanent, so electrolysis as an option might not be as appealing to some. (LINK HERE)

And of course, once your hair is gone, you can always get yourself Vajazzled.

 

 

Beauty Challenge: Go Makeup Free

My eyelashes feel like each and every one of them has a big, fat baby hanging from it. It’s making me so incredibly sleepy. I don’t know how the rest of you do it.

Today was my brother-in-law’s wedding. I don’t know his new bride very well, but she seems super nice, if a bit quiet—though she’s probably just “slow to warm,” like I call myself, instead of the detestable “shy” I’m always labeled. I just presided over my sister’s wedding two weeks ago and knew that I had no mascara to wear; mine was so old it wouldn’t even come off the wand. That’s how often I buy makeup.

I just don’t like wearing it; I know it’s got nasty chemicals in it, for one thing, but I’m also so used to going bare that when I wear makeup, I can really feel it. Even if my nails are painted, they feel heavier, stifled, like they need to breathe. Maybe it’s in my head, but I’m pretty sure it’s all real.

So I bought some “plumping” mascara just for today. I wanted to emulate the lovely look Adele has—that mod 60s style—and to my credit, I sort of pulled it off, before I remembered that I wear glasses and Adele doesn’t. I used to be something of a makeup buff, experimenting all of the time, and even doing my sisters’ and friends’ makeup and hair for dances, Halloween, you name it. So I thought I could jump right back in the saddle for this special day, and I sort of did.

The thing is, I can’t stop falling asleep.

This mascara is so heavy! On the tube, it said that it was supposed to be like having false lashes—something I read that Adele sports—and I guess that’s why they are so damn heavy. But I see women wearing this much makeup—and much more; other than that and my eyeliner, I’m only sporting a bit of cover stick and gloss—every day and they never seem tired. In fact, they seem well put together and bright-eyed and bushy-tailed in contrast to my usual under eye circles and constant yawns. What is the deal?

Maybe you just get used to it. I know when I went through my black eyeliner phase in junior high, when I had to line both lashes with dark liquid liner, I burned my eyes every day and just grin and bore it for the sake of getting the look I wanted.

But if you’re used to this craziness, I would like to challenge women to go without makeup for a week or two. See how your face feels. I will vouch for its cleanness and lightness, and the lack of your lashes closing themselves on you against your will like…mine are doing… right now…

People might counter my challenge with protests; my sister and mother feel naked without their makeup, after all. But I say just try it and see how it feels; you don’t have to do it forever. Of course, if you wanted to, you’d still be beautiful.

Just so you know.

Hey You, Your Face is Orange!

To the Oompa At the Gym

Open Letter to the Oompa at the Gym:

 

I know that you are probably the victim of a Ponzi scheme and want to feel better about yourself by making a good impression at the gym; first, I’d like to commend you on your boob job. Please do tell—who exactly was your surgeon?

 

And, your outfit was really, really cute. I didn’t realize that Pamela Anderson had a line of clothing out. Or is it Hugh Hefner’s line? It doesn’t matter; I’m sure I’ll hear all about it the next time I watch my new favorite TV show “Inside Edition.”

 

So, while your tatas and your outfit are looking good—except for the fact that you forgot to wear a sports bra for the treadmill—your face is orange. I don’t think it’s self-tanning lotion because I’ve used that before without turning my face into a popsicle shade and it didn’t look like a tan form either the sun or a tanning bed. The logical assumption that I am making a very small leap to is that you lathered your face with some sort of make up before heading to the gym, which seems counterproductive in a way.

 

IF you actually attract a guy at the gym, which is possible as we do live in a world of Heidi Montags and Pamela Andersons, what would you say about the orange make up dripping down your face?

 

“It’s natural. My sweat is always orange”? It goes without saying that a response like this would make you sound like a bimbo and you probably don’t want that.

 

And don’t think I’m the only one who notices things like that at the gym. Guys notice that kind of thing to. And, while this may be a hard concept for you to understand, some guys might just think that orange dripping sweat detracts from your inner beauty. Not only that, orange dripping sweat might also detract from your bouncing fake breasts.

 

But probably not.

 

I know I shouldn’t care, but when you’re on the machines staring at a TV without sound, it’s nice to look around at the gym patrons to see what they’re doing. So, yes, that means you, too. I would say that I don’t mean to be rude, but I kind of do mean to be rude, so that wouldn’t be completely honest now, would it?

 

So, as a piece of advice, the next time you head to the gym, do your fake-and-baking before hand so we don’t have to look at your Ooompa face?

 

Sincerely,

 

Becksta

 

Nose Stretching, Mouth Slimming and other odd things we do for beauty

I will never understand why women spend so much time and money on their appearance. Bikini waxes, Brazilian blowouts, eyebrow threading, whatever and whatever is new, it always seems like new treatments become that much more expensive, painful and time-consuming than the last.  Perhaps it’s because I’m so low maintenance or perhaps it’s because I don’t see how spraying orange paint on your body makes you more beautiful than a day in the sun, but I will never accept that the beauty industry is such a multi-national, billion-dollar machine.

But, rant aside, most of the time, I can see how women assume these products will do what they are expected to do.  With these products, it seems that the beauty industry has created yet another Frankenstein’s monster—and seem like they might create one out of their unlucky (or stupid) buyers.

The Slim Mouth piece.

This Japanese invention is supposed to be used to slim up your face and costs around $10 in Japanese pharmacies.  The gadget is a basically a stick with a spring inside. The spring forces your mouth open, and in order to close it, you have to exercise your cheek muscles by sucking them in. As your face becomes tighter, then your lips become bigger comparatively.  Again, this beauty standard is again based on American starlets—let’s see how big we can make our lips!  At least it’s not dangerous...unless you choke on it.  It’s also available for men.   

The HanaHana Nose Stretcher.

This is Japanese, too, and painful. The Nose Stretcher is available for about $7. At least the Japanese aren’t blowing all their money for their beauty torture.  You use the nose stretcher by clamping it over your nostrils for a few minutes each day and the extreme pressure on the cartilage is supposed to stretch out flat or button-nosed gals.  Ouch. I really don’t know how stretching out your cartilage works, but nose shaping is an old trick.  I remember at my high school that all the girls with noses that looked too ethnic (read, too Jewish) would get nose jobs for graduation presents.   

Rejuvenique Electric Facial Mask.

I just put this mask on the list because it is one of the creepiest things I’ve ever seen.  If masks are supposed to represent an alternate self, this one says I am beauty, let me take over your face and kill your soul.  Or something.  Anyway, you’re supposed to put this mask on your face for 15 minutes three to four times per week and it is (duh) supposed to make your skin look youthful by exercising the facial muscles and reducing wrinkles. Just don't let the neighbors see you through the blinds...

 

Meaningful Beauty.

Let me first get back up on my soapbox and say that “Meaningful Beauty” does not come from a line of beauty products.  Second, who is going to believe that Cindy Crawford really needs this stuff to look good? She posed in her underwear and that mole was her only makeup back in the ‘90’s and I don’t think she was mixing her own unique blend of herbs outside of her mansion that she is just now packaging for the general public. But whatever. I think it sucks when celebrities hock products that are supposed to make the average person look like them.  I could fill the ocean with “Meaningful Beauty” and not look a thing like Cindy Crawford.  

All in all, it seems like women should try and achieve actual meaningful beauty instead of buying this crap. Plus, rolling your face in the dirt behind your house probably would be a lot cheaper, a lot less painless and get about the same results as any of this crap.

Sources and further reading:  

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SXcYVh-W14E&feature=related

http://scarychair.com/womens-issues/strange-japanese-beauty-products/

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Owji16tge0

http://www.thefrisky.com/post/246-get-a-bigger-nose-by-stretching-it-with-the-hanahana-nose-stretcher/

http://www.google.com/#sclient=psy&hl=en&source=hp&q=Slim+Mouth+Piece+&aq=0&aqi=g1g-v4&aql=&oq=&pbx=1&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&fp=ff7c59a60f6387a5

Do Your Friends Willingly Share Their Beauty Secrets?

High Crimes and Misdemeanors:  Beauty Info Hoarders

Are you a closet “beauty hoarder,” which is someone who refuses to throw away partially used beauty items after years of gross neglect? This is gross, and you need to get some big gloves, a huge garbage sack, and start cleaning and culling those cupboards.

Lucky for you, I’m not talking about this kind of beauty hoarder today (READ THIS for a true story of beauty hoarding). Today, I’d like to discuss the somewhat sinister beauty info hoarder. A beauty info hoarder is someone who knows all the tricks and secrets about how to LOOK beautiful, but refuses to share any of their beauty knowledge with other women. This kind of person may or may not be beautiful, is more than likely lacking in inner beauty, and acts as if she (or he) has signed a strict confidentiality agreement with everyone from her pedicurist to her hairdresser.

How to Know if You’ve Met a Beauty Info Hoarder

She will lie about which beauty products she uses whenever anyone dares to ask her, guard the phone number of her hairdresser with her life, and will sometimes go so far as to give you false recommendations about what you should do with your own hair and makeup. For example, she might recommend that you get a Mohawk before your big job interview with an investment bank. (Since most beauty info hoarders are not all that brilliant, it’s usually easy to see through their advice.)

What to Do if You Meet a Beauty Info Hoarder

 1.  Run the other way very, very quickly before she:

A.)  Tries to destroy your inner confidence by dissing your hair, makeup, and clothes in a snide manner.

B.)  Advises you that your rich auburn highlights would really look better if they were orange and hands you a bottle of her 1985 bottle of Sun-In.

C.)  Tells you about her new and improved diet, which consists of Snickers, protein bars, and power napping.

D.)  Looks through your personal belongings to see if your beauty products are up to snuff. (If they are, she will likely steal them for herself; that’s just the kind of woman she is.)

2.  Give her the same kind of beauty advice and compliments she would give you ONLY if you can’t avoid talking to her at a party. Obviously, she won’t take the advice, but she might not be so interested in talking to you either. Here are some ideas:

A.)  You might try washing your hair with motor oil. I hear it really conditions the ends.

B.)  The Sinead O’Connor look is totally coming back into fashion. You should try it.

C.)  I like that clown makeup look you having going on. It really looks great.

Cold Cream: Classic Facial Cleanser

I began this year determined to finally nail down a facial cleansing routine that would fix all of my problems and make me a beautiful, stress-free person with glowing skin. Or at least something that didn’t give me a chronic, low-grade rash.

In my first experiment I tried the Oil Cleansing Method. I should mention that after that initial bad experience, I changed my formula a little, and had much better results. (More expensive results, too – jojoba oil was $10 for a tiny little bottle!) I settled on a mixture of 1 part tea tree oil, 1 part vitamin E oil, 2 parts castor oil, and 4 parts jojoba oil.

I wash my face every night before going to bed. (In the morning, in the shower, I just give it a good rinsing.) My skin really liked this mixture. In the depths of winter, when my face is usually quite chapped and irritated, it really seemed to suck up that jojoba oil with a passion.

The problem became one of convenience. It takes a solid 15 minutes to go through the entire oil cleansing routine. And if the oil happens to drip onto your shirt, you have a major oil stain laundry issue. I was looking for something just as gentle on my skin, effective at cleaning, great at moisturizing, but more convenient. More… normal.

The basic formula for cold cream has been in use for several thousand years. Galen, a second-century Greek doctor, is credited with its invention. Galen concocted a mixture of grease and water, and added a bit of fragrance. Although the particulars have changed over the years, the basics remain the same.

To use cold cream, apply small dabs all around your face, then massage it in. The rich cream loosens dirt and makeup, while moisturizing your skin. You then wipe it off with either a tissue or a damp washcloth.

Pond’s Cold Cream is considered the gold standard, and a historical favorite. However, you want to be careful which “flavor” you’re buying. The original cold cream has only seven ingredients: mineral oil, beeswax, ceresin, sodium borate, fragrance, and carbomer. This simple formulation has been a favorite of women for decades.

Other versions of Pond’s Cold Cream introduce a lot of crazy-ass chemicals like Laureth-23 and DMDM Hydantoin, and who needs it? Be sure to read the label! (I wasn’t able to find the right version of Pond’s, but Rite Aid sells a house brand with the original formulation.)

Aside from being quicker to apply and remove, and easier to use (the cream doesn’t drip terribly the way oil does), I found that the cold cream has a pleasing light scent of rosewater. This, too, has its historical ties, as Galen’s original formula included rose petals.

Best of all, the cold cream works for me quite well. In researching it, I found that it is the “secret weapon” of many older women. Including Kylie Minogue, who credits it with keeping her skin so beautiful!

Photo copyright Pond's

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